In the Middle of the Night

A big debate among friends and family these days seems to be ‘where did the stories in my books come from?’ Human life is so fascinating, and the drama of relationships so compelling! When something interesting pops into my head, I have learned to run with it, no matter how odd or dark it may seem.
Some scenes are difficult to write; I try to be aware when to tone an idea down, or when it’s safe to take it to the next level. I may continue writing a provocative scene, and then in the middle of the night, wake up and think, ‘ah, no. Better take that out, or soften it up a little bit.’ An example of this struggle is the murder scene in my upcoming book, The Greeks of Beaubien Street, the story of a Greek-American family who own a grocery store in Greektown, Detroit, Michigan. The daughter, Jill Zannos is the main character. The murder scene I refer to is one Jill spends much of her life solving during the length of the novel. It’s a horrific crime that involves graphic scenes. I am debating as I do my preliminary editing when does something serve its purpose in a story, and when does it only titillate? Even the worst crimes may have an element of acceptability in its translation; it is difficult to write when it goes to the level of disgust. But shouldn’t crime disgust? And why do I want to write about something that would wake me up in the middle of the night because of its disturbing qualities?
Where does my imagination come from? I have had some of the worst experiences a person can have, (as have most other people, I’m learning), and I think the memories contribute to a certain kind of fantasy life that someone who has not been exposed to those experiences may not be able to understand. In the retelling, it is often second nature to embellish and extend the truth. That is why we have to be so careful about the things we say and do in front of small children. The boogeyman may be there, whispering lies.

In a Word, Obsessed

I try really hard not to waste too much time on Twitter.  But once in a while when I am purposely trying to zone out, it’s a great place to go to find new blogs with the focus on reading, writing and publishing.  Most of those I follow are in the publishing world or of writers; I confess to getting ideas for marketing by following their tweets.  But then what happens is I discover more good reads, or worse; English language games and exercises.  My new favorite is Reagan Arthur Books Blog.  Reagan Arthur is the VP of Reagan Arthur Books, which is an imprint of Little, Brown. She’s a young mother, lives in NJ, and knits.  She spends much of her work life hanging out with best-selling authors.  I try to imagine what they talk about when they are together.  I bet the creative juices are flowing.  They probably don’t waste a second of time whining. (yeah right)

Unfortunately for me, my friend Russ introduced me to Seven Little Words, a word game app I immediately uploaded to my iPhone.  Thanks, Russ.  Delays at the airport are no longer a problem.  I look forward to insomnia.  Waiting at the dentist office is a delight.  This is the most addictive word game I have ever run across.  It started me on the hunt for other ways I can halt the onset of brain drain.  I’ve already confessed I think I have something going on up there that may be destructive.

Another favorite blog features free vocabulary games. If I may quote…..from Vocabulary.co.il…..

“What good are crossword puzzles?  A lot of good, if you notice current studies on puzzle-solving and the brain.  Research seems to indicate that working on puzzles that require specific brain strategies may be helpful for conditions such as:

  • Alzheimer’s
  • Attention Deficit Disorder
  • Brain Fog, associated with several autoimmune disorders
  • Dementia
  • Stroke Recovery   A new book out, entitled the “Alzheimer’s Action Plan,” by Dr. P. Murali Doraiswamy, seems to indicate that by challenging the brain, you can form new nerve pathways. “

So I justify the time spent playing with my phone as time that may be helpful preventing my memory from running away any faster then it already is.

The bad editing of my first two books, mostly my fault because I missed errors that should have been caught, makes me crazy.  I may have resolved this problem because Jennifer is now doing my editing and she is a barracuda.  Sorry, dear.  She doesn’t miss a trick. My friend Jim, Betty’s husband, hates when he finds wrong usage of words in books. I think he missed his real vocation which should have been proofreading. I understand how easily it happens.  When I wrote the blog for my yarn shop, I found out later that my former partner would correct my errors in punctuation and word usage. The blog received a few accolades, including a mention in Vogue Magazine.  I still get inquiries from people I featured in stories.  Words are mesmerizing.  I have been known to use the wrong word in conversation and my only excuse is because it sounds like it should be the right word.

Caveat is a favorite wrong usage word for me.  It just sounds so positive, like a feather in one’s cap.  Like an award given for perfect attendance.  But a caveat is a warning.  It’s scary, the word caveat.

Punctuation is a tough one, too. I over use commas.  Jen had a least thirty red marks where commas were either used inappropriately or missing completely when she proofread Dream Lover.  I keep saying to myself, I wish I had listened during high school English.

Off Again

The interior proof for Dream Lover arrived last week and as I reread, the mistakes were mounting and I was getting nervous.  I get to make eighty simple changes free, but it was looking like the task might be a major reediting.  So I got Jen involved and she spent the weekend correcting the manuscript.  I see now why people pay for multiple edits.

At five this morning I got up to fill out the form my publisher uses for corrections and let Nicky out; two raccoons were annihilating my bird-feeders, so I made a rescue before they stole them and dragged them down into the ravine. Jim already scaled the cliff once in the past couple of days to retrieve a feeder that belonged to my mother.  I guess we might have to consider bringing them in at night again which is messy and a pain in the neck.

Now with the corrections form completed, I have to wait for the physical proof to be printed and once that is sent to me and approved, Dream Lover will be released.  In the meantime, I’m working in the studio; this week I have two groups of women visiting, one for a demo and the other for a dye workshop.  I’ll get back to work on rewriting The Savant of Chelsea.  I know I am dragging my feet on that one. It has so much gore in it, but all relevant.  I was up at five this morning worrying about being judged.  Why am I suddenly so worried about what people will say?  If Marie peeking through a key hole at her sister being pleasured by her husband didn’t worry me, why these other books?  I think it is the violence.  It makes me sick when I am writing it, but it is part of the story. You can’t write a crime drama without blood.  Correct? (wringing of hands.)

Isolated Adoration

I must have been going a little crazy, because less than two months after Don’t You Forget About Me was released, book three, Dream Lover will be published.  Both books are continuations of Pam of Babylon.   Dream Lover was fun to write because new characters are introduced and their stories are told in the first person.  The continued drama of Pam and Jack and Sandra and Marie are still told in the third person, although Pam does have a brief opportunity to speak.

The cover is my favorite so far.  When it arrived yesterday, it was one of three choices I had and this one spoke to me.  The  gratitude I was feeling for the powers of the universe, for the joy of writing and how great things have worked out overwhelmed me and I broke down sobbing.  Jim got me five one gram fish oil capsules and I felt better.:-)

Book four is in process, about a quarter of the way finished. Prayers for the Dying juxtaposes between looking back at Jack in the early years, and Pam now, as she really comes into her own.  It is so much fun seeing her shed her former self!  I am stepping away from it for a moment today to play with my family.  Liz and Jim are headed out and we are going to lunch and antiquing.  I need the break desperately.

I’m taking to heart some critiquing a dear relative did yesterday; why are Pam and Sandra both seeing cops in book two?  Truly, it was just a coincidence. A while back another friend pointed out to me that Pam’s cop bf was named Andy; my son is Andy. So forget taking that relationship any further. I will be forever grateful that she told me she had picked up on it right away. It was too Oedipal and more fun to get rid of him anyway.  Oops, I gave something away.

I wish I could write a disclaimer at the beginning of the book.  People, this is a work of fiction.  Its not great literature. It is just something I wanted to write.  I felt like telling a story. The Pam series is just the tip of the iceberg.  I’m dragging my feet about releasing The Savant of Chelsea because I don’t want to deal with the backlash.  It makes suggestions about certain groups that if one were ti take personally, could be offensive.  But once again, that is usually not the writer’s intention.  It is not mine.  I could have a field day of meanness if I were that type of person.  I worked in the Operating Room with myriad doctors and nurses for almost thirty years.  The stories I could tell…..

Another book that is turning into a series is The Greeks of Beaubien Street, a story about a Greek family who owns a grocery store in Greektown.  The daughter is a homicide detective.  Another cop. Okay, I love cops.  So get over it. (You know who you are.) Her boyfriend is a diener at the local morgue. Once again, there are layers of stories and back stories.  And many, many characters.  If you read the bad reviews I got on goodreads.com  most are because the reader doesn’t like all the characters and can’t keep them straight.

Recently a local reporter did a story about me and the books and asked lots of questions about self-publishing.  She wanted to know about costs, etc.  The actual costs are not bad.  I don’t do much myself but write the book.  I have an editor, a designer who does the covers, and I pay for all the technical stuff. Those costs run about $3000 per book.  My friend, John does it all himself.  It also cost a lot to have the book converted into Kindle or Nook, about $150 per conversion.  Marketing costs are astronomical.  Thousands.  I get about a buck for each kindle edition and not much more for the paperback.  So its both a labor of love and a huge investment.  I read last night that 1500 books are published every DAY. That’s a lotta competition.

I don’t know why this reminds me of the first time I saw Shirley Jones on the Partridge Family.  It shocked me because I had heard her voice, and it was beautiful. What was someone with  her singing voice doing on that silly show?  When my daughter was in college, (vocal performance conservatory), we were warned that in spite of her beautiful voice there were thousands of other cute girls out there with equally beautiful voices. The competition would be fierce.  There are so many talented artists, actors, writers, and  other performers. Why does anyone bother to stick their neck out, open themselves up to criticism and make the huge investment of time and money when it is known that chances of success are so slim?  Is success really just luck?  Being at the right place at the right time?  Having the perfect website for marketing?  I am asking these questions because I want to know.

I am driven to write.  For some reason, this is where my life is for now.  I don’t have an outline that directs every word I type.  I make some mistakes and offend some people.  I might tell a story that is really not mine to tell.  But it is inspired.  It really has a purpose, at the very least, to me. My daughter told me that when she read Pam of Babylon, she could hear my voice. That was important to me.  One of the things I love about Facebook is that my friends continuously support me.  It’s isolated adoration.  I am so happy for that.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.

All Things Books

My favorite place in our house.

A very early memory takes me to a place that must have been near Detroit, since that’s where  I grew up during the 1950′s.  The smell of what I now know to be old books hit my olfactory the moment my aunt and I stepped over the threshold.  Leather, paper, cigarette smoke and dust mingled into a heady fragrance that to this day, minus the smoke, provokes a visceral response in me. Used book stores introduced me to the love of books.  The introduction to new book stores came shortly after, but new books don’t have the same appeal.

As adults, wherever we traveled began with a search for a book store. I’ve been to book stores in New Orleans, Wichita Falls, and Sacramento and many more places across the country.  Back in those days, customers weren’t allowed to bring beverages in, unlike today where they are sold next to the books.  Books were reverenced.

I am somewhat of a book hoarder, too.  A scene from my marriage has a very concerned and almost angry husband asking me why I needed to bring ‘moldy’ paperback books into our house.  On a weekend antiquing jaunt, I’d happened across a gentleman who was downsizing his own sizable book collection which included a complete set of the paperback Mentor Philosopher Series.  I’ve got ‘em all; Spinoza, Bacon and Pascal to name a few.  Then came the great anthropologists.   Margaret Mead is my favorite, (didn’t they disclaim some of her observations twenty years ago?)  She was all sex and culture, all of the time.

I also have all of the Greek classics.  In paperback.  I think Jim must be a book snob because a few years later, maybe in the early eighties, he signed on for the Franklin Mint Library book club. Or maybe he was hoping his purist attitude would wear off on me.  It never did.  Those shining, gold-leafed fly-leafed tomes make my garage sale finds look shabby, but they are behind glass and anyone can pick up one of my used books and curl up with a cup of tea for an afternoon without worrying about ruining it.

My aunt sent me the complete works of Dumas; forty red leather bound volumes of bliss.  I also have an ancient Gibbons The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire, a very early Life and Letters of Charles Darwin, and Winston Churchill’s The History of the English Speaking Peoples.  I have these books; I have NOT read them.  My taste leans toward Pearl Buck, Betty Smith and compilations by Alfred Hitchcock.  (Insert laughter here.) Odd that my own writing tends to be more like a down at the heels Jackie Collins. (with all due respect.)

My books also reflect what I was doing at different stages of my life.  I have an extensive library of Christian literature.  My friends and family have learned that it isn’t wise to argue with me about the Bible; I know what it says and when things have been taken out of context.  Two entire bookcases are filled with books relating to yarn.  I have every weaving book that was published between 1975 and 1980 because I had a store that sold weaving supplies.  I no longer weave, but I don’t think I should part with the books.  I also have lots of knitting books; I like looking at the pictures, and many dyeing, spinning, and surface design books.

I have a friend who has cataloged her books.  At one time that idea appealed to me, but now I realize it would take up too much time.  Imagine being able to put your hand on any volume you need.  I can almost do that without the organization.

The only regrets I have are having loaned books out.  I no longer do that.  If you have ever received books from me its because I love you and want you to have them.  By the time I give a book up, I am so done with it.  It might be taunting me.  Read me again.  Or worse, read me the first time. And I might have no intention.  Or it might be something from my past that I know I will not revisit.  A past loved hobby, for instance.

One thing I should probably not admit is that the Jenkins’ family receives something from Amazon two or three times a week. Scary.  It is sad that the independents are  threatened by such a huge and inexpensive online presence. But one thing Amazon will never replace is the used book store.  We have a fabulous used store in South Haven.  The proprietress is rude, at least to me, but it is so worth suffering through it to browse in the shop.

Last month, when I was in California for a few days, I went to a used store in Santa Cruz with my Aunt Yvonne and her friend, Bruce.  It was truly a reverent experience.  The place was huge, it was open late at night, but we couldn’t stay too long because there was no bathroom to be found.  I could have stayed there for hours, so maybe the lack of facilities was a good thing.

My mother was a lover of books.  I argued with her to get rid of a huge collection of books she’d moved from her antique shop back to her house when the shop closed.  After she died, my sister gave me the job of going through the books and getting rid of them. It should have been easy, correct?  I hounded the poor woman for ten years about giving them away.  And you know what happened?  I could only get rid of one.  One book.  So if she is up there reading this, I’m sorry, Mom.  I know exactly what you were thinking.

I bought home a ten pound Landmarks of Detroit, and old cookbooks to add to my vast cookbook collection. (I don’t cook.)

This actually has a picture of a long lost relative, maybe a great uncle, Richard Haigh, who was an attorney in Detroit.

Most other things I resisted, for now. My mom would be happy to know I am unable to get rid of her books!  It was a joy we shared.

Today I am going to write.  I haven’t done any new writing in months; its been about revising and editing.  The second book just came out last month and third one will be ready in a few weeks. I feel like I should stall it a little bit, because there won’t be another for quite awhile.

Speaking of, I have a new editor! My daughter, Jennifer! Jen’s second degree is in fiction writing and she actually did some editing at her first job out of college.  I’m psyched!

Back to work!

Validation

Today, the Kirkus Review for my second novel, Don’t You Forget About Me was released.  I am thrilled, but also shocked.  It’s just one of those things!  Here’s the review….

Jenkins, Suzanne
DON’T YOU FORGET
ABOUT ME
CreateSpace (338 pp.)
$14.99 Paperback
December 29, 2011
ISBN: 978-1466219007
After a wealthy man of high reputation suffers a heart attack and dies, three women are left to grapple with the aftermath of his death and the twisted details of their past in this riveting fiction novel.
The story, a continuation of Jenkins’ Pam of Babylon (2011), sets out to explore the life and grief of the wife, the sister-in-law and the mistress of Jack, the deceased. From the beginning, the reader understands that all three women are aware of their positions in Jack’s life and to each other. Jack’s wife, Pam, knows that he was
engaged in a long-term affair with her younger sister, Marie. What’s more, the mistress, Sandra, is pregnant with his child. But surprisingly, these are not the most shocking twists that Jenkins lays out. Little do the three women know that there is more that ties them to Jack and to each other than meets the eye. As secrets unfold—some
deceptive, some deadly—the women are left intimately bound by their past and by a future that can never break free from Jack. Jenkins writes with a fast-paced, scenic style, pushing the story forward and wasting little time on interior monologue or back
story. Perhaps this is one of the best aspects of the novel—a page-turner, the story remains immediate, rarely breaking from forward motion.
Jenkins develops characters not by describing them, but by placing them in conflict and context with new people, places and situations. What’s
more, the novel never fully resolves the conflicts it opens up, leaving room for the next book to explore the aftermath of the characters’ secrets and
decisions. The characters are sympathetic, round and believable; watching them grapple with difficult decisions creates an engaging, dynamic
read.
An exciting, surprising story that leaves the reader hungry for the next book.

Kirkus Indie, Kirkus Media LLC, 6411 Burleson Rd., Austin, TX 78744
indie@kirkusreviews.